Dorothy's Isle of Pines Root Beer

Do you know the Root Beer Lady? Well if not, this is your chance to get acquainted. Dorothy's Isle of Pines Root Beer comes from Ely, MN. I stumbled upon this website while researching new root beers to review and ordered a 6 pack of the root beer to be mailed to my house. You can look over the website if you'd like to learn more about Dorothy Molter and her life living in a remote part of Northern Minnesota for the better part of a century. I'll just fill you in on the basics: a nurse by training, she was fond of making root beer for traveling tourists and campers/adventurers. She became such an attraction that she was dubbed "the Root Beer Lady", and now years after her passing her story, estate, and legacy have been turned into a museum and peddled to the masses via this website. You can get an illustrated story book about Dorothy, a video while she was still alive in her later years, her famous root beer, t-shirts, hats, magnets, root beer soap, and even root beer earrings. Honestly, the only thing that interested me was the root beer (one-track mind), but i am sure she was a lovely lady. Feel free to read more about her if you'd like though.

The bottles are typical, and the label is loaded with iconic imagery celebrating the life of Dorothy. Her face is plastered on the front and the rest of it is made to look back-woodsy and rugged-frontiery. The background of the label appears to be aspen bark, there is a picture of her cabin around the neck, and the label contains lots of info leading you back to the site that i linked. I had to order a 6 pack because that's the smallest units they sell, and with shipping it ended up being around $25. That's not cheap, but i am finding that most orders i put in for mail order root beer run about that much. I don't like spending that much, but i do it for you, my loyal readers. You're continued support is thanks enough, unless you feel like you want to send me some money to compensate. If so, let me know.

Though i give her props for being a root beer expert for several years, the current recipe that is sold via the website is simply nothing special. It reminds of some natural, organic root beers i have reviewed, although i don't think it is. I am sure it's mass produced now with few of the original processes still in place. It's not bad, but i don't really like it that much. I can't put my finger on it, but it tastes like a root beer i have tried before. But basically, it tastes kind of watered down, a touch too sweet, and lacking in carbonation. Plus, it leaves a bad taste in your mouth afterward. This one doesn't really jump out and grab me at all. Like Dorothy herself, this seems weak and frail to me.

My official review is that Dorothy's Isle of Pine's Root Beer gets 4 (four) IBCs. My wife isn't a fan at all, which means i have 5 more bottles to drink by myself, and to be honest, i don't think i like it that much either. I might give them away as Christmas gifts or just bring them in to work and leave them in the lunch room like i did with the other hippie natural root beers i didn't want to finish drinking. So in short, if you find yourself in the area where she lived and want to check out her old stomping grounds, then grab a root beer. Otherwise, save your money.

Joe's BBQ Home Made Root Beer

I'm smack in the middle of finals right now, and it has not been kind to me. This semester has worn me out, and on top of it all i currently have a cold. It's miserable, but you're not here to listen to me whine, you're here for some root beer news. Well that's just what i have for you today. I have lived here in the Mesa/Gilbert/Phoenix area for a good portion of my life and it never occurred to me to review the home made root beer at Joe's Real BBQ in Gilbert until i was there last night for a birthday gathering of a friend of mine (happy birthday Robbie). They have great food at reasonable prices, but more importantly, they have home made root beer. Joe's has been open since 1998, and although it doesn't say it on their site expressly, i am going go ahead and say they have been making their own root beer since their inception. That's the kind of creative power i reserve for my reviews; making up facts. It's probably true anyway, so deal with it. In addition to the root beer beverage, they also tote a root beer cake. My wife was eager to try it, but we were fairly disappointed when we discovered that it's just chocolate cake and doesn't taste like root beer at all. However, it did spark some ideas on making a genuine, delicious root beer cake that myself and a few associates of mine may need to perfect and flood the market with.

The picture i have depicting the soda is of a Joe's BBQ paper cup. Not that exciting i know, but it's the best i can do since i don't think they bottle and/or ship it anywhere. So in order to try it you must go down to the establishment itself. That shouldn't be a cause of distress though. As i mentioned before, the food is very good. Anyway, there is a cartoony guy on the orange cup who i will assume is Joe himself. The background is a road map of the great state of Arizona, or as it's known to anyone who lives here, God's country.

Home made root beer doesn't hold much appeal for me, and as much as i like Joe's food, his root beer leaves something to be desired. There is plenty of carbonation, so that's not the problem, but the flavor is just not that great. You know those bottle caps candies? The ones that taste like different sodas, like cola, cherry, etc.? Well this root beer basically tastes just like the root beer flavored bottle cap. The weird thing is that i like the root beer flavored bottle cap candy, but it doesn't translate well into an actual beverage. The flavor is very sharp for some reason and ultimately kind of a let down. It's not terrible by any means, but i think Joe should make some revisions to the recipe and come back with something a little more palatable.

My official review is that Joe's Real BBQ gets 5 (five) IBCs. That's being generous too. I like Joe's, so i don't want to slam his root beer, but it's really not that great. It's unfortunate. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't try it if you go down there. The rest of the dining experience more than makes up for the little bit that the root beer lacks. Plus, if you go on your birthday, you're meal is free, and that right there is some sweet action.

Big Fizz Root Beer

Hello all you out there in root beer internet land! I have another root beer to review for you today. This one i have known about for some time now and just recently got a hold of. It's called Big Fizz Root Beer. I found it on the Rite Aid website while looking for other root beers. Rite Aid is comparable to a Walgreens or CVS store. Unfortunately there are no Rite Aids in Arizona, the closest store being in California. Well as it turns out, my wife and i made a little trip with her extended family back in October to visit my wife's favorite place, or as i like to call it, "the gropiest place on Earth" on account of all the nefarious characters regularly groping your children there. Personally, i hate that place. It's the biggest exploitation of children since child labor. But once in a while i have to endure the torture of spending way to much money to be somewhere i absolutely hate in order to appease my wife's unhealthy Peter Pan fetish/obsession. SOOO... long story short, while we were in California we made a trip to the local Rite Aid and found a bottle of Big Fizz so i could review it. I am not sure if Big Fizz distributes exclusively through Rite Aid, but that's the impression that i get from the website. This mass marketed soda line comes in several flavors.

I picked up a 2 liter bottle of their root beer, and i am not sure if there is any other sizes or variations on packaging available. The bottle is a typical 2 liter plastic bottle. The label is very plain, lots of writing and text, with a limited color scheme. It's brown and white, with a little bit of yellow splashed in there for "flare". I don't know. Companies like this just want to throw something out there to get a small piece of the big pie, so the label doesn't have to be flashy or memorable. It just has to convey the message, which i suppose this one does just fine. There are some swirly designs in the background and carbonated bubbles coming off the word "Fizz", i guess to accentuate that this stuff if fizzy.

At least the root beer lives up to its name. It is indeed very fizzy. There is a lot of carbonation in this drink, which is fine by me. It's not enough to kill you or anything, but they don't hold back on it. Other than that, this root beer is completely forgettable. There is nothing very appealing about it. The root beer flavor is very watered down, which is too back because it's not a bad flavor. It also has a good aroma, but the taste fades so fast that you forget what it even tastes like right after you drink it. Even for the store brands, this one doesn't really make a mark, and being on the low end of the store brands is a sad place to be. It's not completely awful and is basically everything i expected it to be, but that still makes it a fundamentally bad root beer.

My official review is that Big Fizz Root Beer gets 3 (three) IBCs. I would say it's a high 3 because i don't detest this stuff, but it is not good enough to earn a low 4, so i have to mark this one down as sub-par. I don't know how widely spread out Rite Aids are across our great nation, but chances are that unless you're in some podunk, one-hat town there are other options out there for you as far as root beer is concerned. And in those cases, i suggest you look somewhere else for a decent root beer.

Napa Valley Root Beer

To start this review, i am obligated to give a "shout out" to my coworker Heather. Heather is a faithful reader and ardent follower of my work, and she was nice enough to lend a hand in finding a new root beer for me to review. She found this root beer at the local Big Lots for only $2 for a 4-pack. Quite a deal if you ask me. Anyway, she said she'd be happy to get me a pack to further my cause. So kudos to you Heather. Thanks for the helping hand, and let this be a lesson to the rest of you; when you help me you're really only helping yourself. Anyway, Napa Valley Soda Co. has been around since 1872, which puts it in the grandfather realm as far as root beers are concerned. Nappy Valley is of course in California and is famously known as wine country, but this soda is now distributed by Wet Planet, which has its headquarters in Rochester, NY. There are several fruity flavors, but it seems like they showcase the root beer (which any good soda company with good business sense should do).

This root beer comes in 12 oz. clear glass bottle. It's not necessarily a typical bottle though, it's a little different shaped. Kind of old fashionedy. Anyway, the sticker label is very colorful, complete with a rainbow hot air balloon and the flowery, hippie love child font (which i am not sure Microsoft is actually responsible for) spells out the name of the soda company over a spiraling galaxy like swirl. Probably influenced by the San Francisco hippy movement of the mid to late 1960's. I don't really care for the label, but in this case, i don't think that's what's most important.

I have long held that root beer in clear glass bottles is usually disappointing. Well up until now, every root beer in a clear glass bottle has backed that theory up. This root beer however flies in the face of all the presumptions i had about this. For starters, this root beer has a good amount of carbonation, something which is not common in clear glass bottle root beers. Most has little to no carbonation, but Napa Valley comes stocked with just the right amount. Second, the flavor is full and satisfying, while most other clear glass bottle root beers seem watered down and bland. The distinct full bodied root beer flavor and slight carmel undertones really impressed me. Granted, it's nothing earth shattering or completely new, but all that aside, it is a very refreshing and surprisingly good root beer. Both my wife and i thoroughly enjoyed it, and at $2 for a 4-pack, there's really no excuse why this stuff shouldn't get the approval of everyone else also.

My official review is that Napa Valley Root Beer gets 8 (eight) IBCs. This is a solid root beer, one i think has universal appeal. It's good, inexpensive, and refreshing. I am pleased with it, and i want to say thanks again to my coworker Heather for picking this one up for me. I'm adding it to my regulars list. I am not sure if Big Lots are located all across this great nation, but if you find yourself near one, you should stop in and pick up some of this stuff.

Journey Desert Sage Root Beer

Before i dive into this review (which is bound to be short), i just want to toot my own horn and say that i have officially been professionally reviewing root beers for one year now. Looking back, it's amazing and awe inspiring to see how many lives i've blessed with this important work i do. I appreciate all of the praise you, my loyal readers, shower upon me on a regular basis. So here's to another great year of root beer reviewing. Cheers!

So anyway, for the first review of my second official year, i'm pleased to announce that i tracked down one of the other two root beers created by the Journey soft drinks company. For a rundown on Journey, please see my Journey John Barleycorn post as it will save everyone time. The basics are that the company claims to make sodas from the best ingredients available. But from my review of John Barleycorn, the company has a lot more work to do. Even some of you, my faithful readers, put in some of your comments affirming my astute observation of a truly awful root beer (although, i will concede that one with a far inferior ability to mine could easily come to the same conclusion). Well i am sorry to say that this root beer is in the same wheelhouse.

The label on the 12 oz. bottle is basically just like that of John Barleycorn with a different color scheme. There is a soft green background to coincide with the Desert Sage name. I don't know if it's just a clever name or if they actually put Desert Sage in the drink, but if so i have something to say to the Journey company... STOP IT! This stuff is just as bad as John Barleycorn. It is completely flat, it doesn't taste like root beer at all, and it leaves a nasty taste in your mouth afterward. It tastes extremely similar to Route 66, almost like a rotten fruit flavor. It's awful. Don't waste your time with this company (again).

My official review is that Journey Desert Sage gets 1 (one) IBC. I don't know who in their right mind would think this company makes quality root beers. I haven't tried any of their other sodas, but i think any soda company worth its salt can be judged entirely from its root beer, and this company happens to have three root beers. So far, Journey has two strikes. That's enough for me to never want anything to do with them again, but i will continue my quest to track down the final Journey root beer. Don't hold your breath though.

Pearson Bros. Root Beer

This is another one of the root beers i have recently ordered online. Before i get into the root beer, i want to give you the run down of Soda Samurai, the site i ordered this root beer from. I like the site because they have a decent root beer selection (as well as many other kinds of sodas), i can order the root beers individually instead of in packs or cases, the shipping isn't outrageous, and they even sent me this little bottle opener key chain, which will come in handy for those pesky non-twist tops. So kudos to you Soda Samurai. Check them out if you get a chance. They are decent.

Anyway, Pearson Bros. root beer is made in San Francisco, CA, and the reason i know that is because it says so on the bottle. Other than that, i found it hard to find much info about Pearson Bros. However, I did a bit of digging and investigative journalists everywhere should be proud of me for finding this website that quotes the creaters of Pearson Bros. Root Beer, Matt and Eric Pearson (and yes, they are actually brothers). This article in the San Francisco Chronicle newspaper tells that the root beer has been around since 1996 and can be found mostly in the Bay Area. Aside from this, i can't find much else on Pearson Bros. But I guess there are a lot of famous Peasons out there, including the distrubutors of some well known but unappealing candy, and even a statistical genius of sorts. I actually knew some Pearsons growing up in Northern Arizona, and they seemed pretty successful as well. Must be something in the name. I guess it only makes statistical sense that the probability of a Pearson getting into the root beer business is much higher than a person with any other surname. Don't believe me? Take a look at this. I'm pretty sure it proves my point.

The bottle is a 12 oz. clear glass bottle and the label is very simple, but it stands out. Red really catches the eye, or at least my eye, which is what is important. It has a picture of the Golden Gate Bridge on it and big text of the name of the root beer, but not much else. It's very plain, but i like it. And unfortunately, that may be the only thing i like about it. Let's just start off by saying i am not sure what it is, but i have a prejudice against root beers in clear glass bottles. There are a few i have liked, but it's rare.

So what's wrong with Pearson Bros.? Let's start with the color. The clear glass bottles give away the fact that the color of the root beer isn't very rich or deep. It's very light brown in color and transparent enough for me to see right through it. Again, this is usually an indication to me that i am not going to like the root beer. I have reviewed enough of them to make this correlation. So if the color is off, the taste isn't going to be there either. This stuff is very bland. It has enough carbonation, but just barely. And the flavor is very watery and sugary. It doesn't linger and doesn't make an impression, much like many of the other light colored, clear glass bottle root beers (I'm looking at you Olde Brooklyn). But while it's nothing to write home about, it's not completely awful either. There just isn't anything about it that would make me want to travel to the Bay Area for more.

My official review is that Pearson Bros. gets 4 (four) IBCs. I've had worse, but i've also had much, much better. It doesn't stand out from many of the other root beers and seems like just another label with not much going on inside. So for those of you in the Bay Area who are looking for some good root beer, you will probably need to look else where. But to be completely honest, you're probably Chinese and don't drink root beer anyway. Hey, according to Pearson, it's a statistical fact.

Goose Island Root Beer

Hello my faithful readers. I apologize again for the length between my reviews, but it is getting harder to find root beers to review in my area, so i have to branch out. As a result, this is a very special review for two reasons. One, this is the root beer i was unable to try in Chicago due to it being out of stock in the grocery store. Two, this is one of the root beers i have ordered online in my first round of mail order root beering. I finally turned to ordering new root beers online and having them shipped to me here in Phoenix, and this isn't ideal for me because it's expensive and i usually have to order at least a six pack (some sites require i order a whole case). The site i ordered this root beer from is called Straub's. They do offer some samplers, but regardless of what you order, it has to at least be a six pack, and shipping isn't the cheapest. But i gotta do what i gotta do, and this is what the next phase of my root beer reviewing requires of me. So anyway, let's get to it, shall we?

Goose Island Root Beer is native to Chicago. The Goose Island Brewpub first opened it's doors in 1988 and focuses on brewing beers and hand crafted sodas. In addition to root beer, Goose Island makes 4 other flavors of soda. There are two locations where Goose Island now maintains brewpubs, both of which act as a restaurant where visitors can go and grab a bite to eat with their custom made brew of choice. From the website, they seem like pretty decent places to go for an evening meal. Maybe i'll have to check it out if my wife and i decide to get back to Chicago any time soon.

The bottle is a dark brown glass, 12 oz. bottle with a stick on label. I like the design on the bottle, and it's apparently pretty new. I was looking at other reviewers and seeing what one in particular said about Goose Island (which was a sham of a review if you ask a professional like me), and the old label is kinda corny and less desirable. This new label is simple, bold, clean, and neo-classic. I dig it. It's very straight forward and doesn't waste time. Let that be a lesson to the rest of you unreviewed root beers out there. Don't waste my time!

This root beer is made with 100% cane sugar. I am not one that usually gets hung up on this aspect of root beer anatomy, but i know there are a lot of people out there who do. So with that i will say that this is probably the best of the cane sugar root beers i have had. This stuff is really good. It reminds me a little of Stewart's, with just a tiny touch of carmel, good carbonation, and a great, smooth root beer flavor throughout. This stuff definitely delivers. Another notable cane sugar root beers is AJ Steven's, but there is something about it that really kinda turns me off to cane sugar. It's not bad, it's just... different. Like drinking the milk at the end of a bowl of Frosted Flakes. Kinda sludgy; i don't recommend it. But Goose Island does a great job of tasting like a great root beer should taste. In the end, it has a winning recipe. Maybe not on level with Iron Horse, but definitely up there with the Saranac crowd.

My official review is that Goose Island gets 8 (eight) IBCs. It's a good root beer, and one that i think Chicago should run with. Berghoff kinda steals the claim that it's Chicago's favorite, but time and time again i am not that impressed with it. But i think Goose Island has the right taste. It's decent, and unfortunately the only way i found of getting it was to go online. But if you're willing to go to those lengths for a good hand crafted root beer, this one is worth the shipping.